Mythos
by Kraven Ergeist
Summary: Kyon tries to help Yuki become more human, and gets more than he bargained for. Kyon x Yuki :: FINISHED! :: See author profile for lemon side story...
1. Chapter 1

**Haruhi Suzumiya Fan Fiction**

**Mythos**

By Kraven Ergeist

Chapter One

If you asked me today, I couldn't have told you how I'd gotten mixed up with Haruhi Suzumiya. One minute, she showed up in my life, and the next minute, I was attending some insane club (against my will) that she had formed to track down supernatural beings that didn't exist.

Or so I thought.

Little did I know that centered around Haruhi were not one, not two, but three individuals, each exhibiting characteristics typical of supernatural beings, which, if you'll excuse the oxymoron, broke down like this:

Koizumi Itsuki, ESPer - capable of enormous telekinetic ability every other week, and only in certain spots. Asahina Mikuru, time traveler - her age, time of origin, and duration of stay all classified information. And Nagato Yuki, alien - a life form so vastly different from humanity that the term biology literally doesn't apply to her.

And Haruhi still has no knowledge of their existence, at least, as supernatural beings. And according to their combined theories concerning Haruhi which I have yet to fully accept, if I enjoy life in the natural world at all, I'd better hope it stays that way.

This is harder than you might think - because at any time, Haruhi might just randomly will something unexpected into existence just to appease her boredom. And then, she could just as easily lose interest, and leave the unnatural occurrence as is. Ah, the joys of babysitting a cosmically volatile teenager. Even with an alien, a time traveler, and an ESPer, we have a hard time containing the messes she inadvertently makes sometimes. And what's worse is that stopping the events from occurring is both impossible and a bad idea, as appeasing Haruhi comes before containing the actual messes she makes. Because according to the combined consensus of our club's three supernatural beings, should Haruhi ever come to disappointment, the world could end.

I know. I'm having a hard time believing it too.

Want to know what's even harder to swallow? The fact that I, an unassuming, everyday, average, and in every way normal human teenage boy from Japan, might somehow hold more sway over Haruhi than Koizumi, Mikuru and Yuki combined.

Yeah, that's where I draw the line.

Haruhi's hyperactive personality hasn't precisely been helping us with our job either. The number of times I've wanted to just tell Haruhi the truth so she could just contain the activity herself…

But no, that's dangerous too. If she were to learn about what she was capable of, there are a number of things most likely to occur. One, she freaks out, and as a result, destroys the universe. Two, she lets the power get to her head, and she sets out to dominate the world, in the process, destroying the universe. Three, she gets bored and lets the world go to pot, destroying the universe. Or four, without a guarantee that she can even manipulate it consciously at will, destroys the universe while trying to figure it out.

The overlying result in all four situations is pretty obvious.

There is a bit of silver lining to all this. Haruhi's not an unattractive young woman. Neither is Yuki. And Mikuru…well, let's just say that someone with her level of innocence should not simultaneously be endowed her level of assets.

Koizumi is also pretty interesting to talk to. Mikuru serves green tea during club, which is nice. And whenever Haruhi gets an idea to dress her up a bunny girl outfit or a nurse's outfit or a maid's outfit, I usually manage to confiscate whatever footage gets taken.

Strictly for matters of propriety, of course.

Though a very shameful little voice at the back of my mind keeps wondering why Yuki never gets asked to dress up.

I stole a glance at her. She was sitting in her usually spot by the window, reading a book. When I said the term biology doesn't apply to her, I wasn't kidding. Apparently, the idea of little green aliens was a _tad_ shy of the margin. Yuki comes from a race that isn't even carbon based. I'm not even sure they're made up of actual matter. Her physical form that we could all see is just a farce I'm told. Her actual makeup is something composed entirely of data.

So I'm told.

Don't ask me _how_ data can create a life form with no medium. Maybe there _is_ a medium, I don't know. She told me it would be impossible to explain, and I believe her. Why? Because I've seen her manipulate the data of the world around us to make impossible things happen. Like making a baseball bat that homes in on the ball. Or creating spatial rifts that open up alternate dimensions in reality.

The point is she does some weird stuff.

So, why is it that she's so incapable of some of the most basic human things? She reads through books like TV shows, and she never puts her book down, save for monitoring Haruhi during moments of instability. But she refuses to make regular conversation, and apart from serving tea when I visited her apartment, she exhibits almost none of the behaviors expected of normal humans.

Obviously, she's not human. But there had been a second data entity hidden among the students who acted much more human than Nagato. Asakura Ryoko. She'd been our class rep, for crying out loud. She was so vastly different from Yuki, I still had trouble believing they were the same underneath. She would _approach_ people! She would initiate conversations. She made facial expressions!

Of course, she'd also tried to kill me. So, maybe it was a good thing that Yuki wasn't like Asakura.

"Nagato…" I said, trying to put an end of the silence. Koizumi and Mikuru had yet to arrive, and I was worried about what Haruhi would do to me once she saw me alone. Probably swindle me into doing another one of her impossibly strenuous errands.

Yuki, however, remained motionless.

"I don't think Koizumi and Mikuru are coming."

Yuki didn't so much as look up. "I see."

I searched for the right words. "Umm…I was thinking…do we really have to monitor Haruhi twenty-four/seven?"

She turned a page. "No, but regular interaction would be best."

I bit my lip. What was I getting at here?

"Why don't we take the day off?"

Yuki didn't react.

"Haruhi will be fine, don't worry," I tried to reassure her. "She could probably use some time to blow off some steam after our last little episode. Some down time would do her some good. And to be honest, I really could use some as well."

Yuki blinked. "I see. Then leave."

My throat was dry.

"Uh…what I mean is…why don't you and I _both_ take the day off?"

This time Yuki looked up.

I was frozen as she stared at me. For a data being who could breeze through books, speak a few thousand sentences within the space of a second, and type on a keyboard faster than the speed of thought, she was certainly taking her time analyzing me at that moment.

"You wish for me to depart this establishment with you?"

Finally she spoke!

"Yeah," I nod, hoping I hadn't been misunderstood. Right when you thought that Nagato knew what was going on, she could do the most peculiar things. Like trying to move a laser mouse on an invisible vertical surface. Or-

"Very well."

I blinked. "Um…ok. You want to go now? Before Haruhi shows up."

Nagato closed her book. "Yes."

Without further ado, she got to her feet.

Curious. She hadn't misinterpreted what I'd said and tried jumping out the window or something. Maybe Yuki was slowly learning how to blend in better. She still clearly had a long way to go, but I was surprised at how well she'd been adapting to human life, all things considered. For a being composed entirely of data to both create a human form and live as a human convincingly as she had been doing, well…I'm still not sure how it worked, but it was definitely impressive.

"So…" I broke the silence yet again – something I was getting used to doing around Yuki. "Where do you want to go?"

Her yellow eyes seemed to flicker. "Are we not each going to our homes?"

I closed my eyes. So much for not misinterpreting.

"I was kind of hoping that you and I could go somewhere together. Like…" I thought back. What places had Yuki enjoyed? "…Like the library or something."

Yuki took her usual second and a half to contemplate.

"I see."

Was that a yes or a no? Hell if I knew. Just head to the library and see if she follows you. With Yuki, actions truly spoke louder than words.

We eventually made it to the library, and Yuki was still following me. So far so good. I watched her practically drift like a leaf on the wind. Well, she'd be satisfied for as many hours as you liked. I went around, browsing a few books, before losing interest and following Nagato, seeing what she tended towards.

I could detect no rhyme or reason to the subjects she tended towards. She would pick up classic literature, cookbooks, self-help, reference books, anything. She would read a few lines of text, then put the book down and look for a new one. Following her around like this was hardly a sound method of determining Yuki's interests. But then, for a girl who very makeup was by nature not human, perhaps she didn't have a "preference" as we understood the word.

One way to find out.

"So, Yuki…" I said, looking over her shoulder. The book she was reading through was titled "Studies in clinical psychology – an in depth review of the human mind." She was focused on a chapter concerning the limbic system from the looks of it. Don't ask me what that was. "Do you like psychology?"

Yuki just barely nodded. Had I not been attuned to her subtle movements, I would have missed it.

"Umm…" Yuki was a character of precise wording, so I had to choose my words carefully. "What is your most preferred type of book?"

Yuki continued reading. "None."

I blinked. Ok, she obviously liked reading, so that probably meant that she didn't have a _favorite_, and just read any book indiscriminately.

"So…" I paused. "Why do are you constantly reading, anyway?"

For this, Yuki didn't hesitate.

"My existence is based around information, so I absorb as much information as possible."

I shrug. "Well, wouldn't it be faster to connect to the Internet?"

Yuki paused. "Yes."

I shrugged. She wouldn't elaborate unless I spoke.

"So, why don't you do that instead?"

"In order to do so, I need to discorporate from my body," she said. "That would hinder my disguise."

I nodded. That had been the most she'd spoken all day.

I fell silent, and Yuki went roaming again to find another book to fill her ever-burning need for information. What she hoped to get out of all this reading, I'll never know.

"Nagato…" my stomach growled. "I'm gonna go get something to eat. You want anything?"

"No."

I frowned. "You _do_ eat, don't you?"

"This body requires minimal sustenance."

Ah. She only needed to eat in small quantities because she did so little to expend energy. I was getting better at interpreting what she said.

"Well, would you mind coming with me?" I said. I decided to elaborate. "I hate to eat alone."

This was a test, though I doubt she could tell. How strong was this need for information? Technically, my desires weren't a fraction as important as Haruhi's, which she would answer at a moments call. Now it was just a matter of choice. Would she abandon her books, even temporarily, to see to that I was satisfied as well?

She put her book back on the shelf. "Very well."

I smiled. I was making progress.

We sat down at a cyber café near the library. I ordered a pastry and waited for Yuki to notice that we had access to the Internet.

"So…you discorporate when you access the Internet?" I asked. "Can't you just do it the way normal humans do?"

I emphasized my point by sitting down at one of the computers and accessing the Internet.

"That is an obsolete method."

I stared at her.

"And reading books isn't?"

"This body must remain portable," she explained. "That method of access to the Internet is not portable. Books are."

"Well, we're not going anywhere now," I sighed. "And as obsolete as it is, it's got to be faster than reading, even at your speed."

She conceded the point by sitting down at the computer next to mine, and typing at the ungodly speed she did, went to site after site of the most random gobbledygook.

"Forgive me for asking," I mentioned, as I looked over the nature of the content she was browsing. "But is that…relevant information?"

Yuki's eyes remained fixed on the screen.

"Relevance is not an issue. What's important is absorption. Relevance can be determined later."

I groaned. "That's a pretty roundabout method. Wouldn't it be more efficient to actively pursue relevant information?"

Yuki remained silent for a few moments. "I have no way of determining what is relevant information by human standards."

Ah. So the truth comes out.

"Could you use a human's input?"

Yuki's progression paused as she looked at me.

"Yes."

Great. What had I gotten myself into? Where was I supposed to even start?

"Alright…" I stuttered. This could take all day! "What do you need, exactly? What do you define as relevance?"

"Information regarding humanity," Yuki said simply. "I need to perfect my guise."

There was the understatement of the year.

"So, basically, you're trying to appear more human?"

"Correct."

I sighed. "Then why aren't you observing other humans? You should try basing your actions off of what you see from a reasonable human subject."

"Such as?"

"Well…" I thought. "Let's start with myself. You can switch role models as need be, but for now…"

"Very well."

She sat still for some time, and I let out a sigh.

She did the same.

I blinked, and she blinked.

I cleared my throat, and she continued to imitate my actions

I groaned. "Nagato, you don't need to mimic my every movement. I meant use me as a template for comparing your own behavior to."

"I am."

"Look," I sighed, trying to level with her. "I know that you're _capable_ of perfectly replicating my every move, but in a human sense, basing your actions off of somebody means watching for a certain set of actions, and _then_ trying them yourself."

Yuki nodded. "I see."

I groaned. I'd better check if she really did see.

"Here," I got to my feet, digging into my pocket. I offered her a handful of change as she stood up.

"Now, stay here and watch me…"

I went over to the counter of the cafeteria, and ordered a small drink. I paid the cashier and took my drink back to Yuki, who had surprisingly listened to what I'd said and waited for me.

"Now, do what I did," I explained. "Take the money I gave you, order the exact same thing that I ordered, and pay the same amount I did, using the words I used. If you can, try using the same tone that I used as well."

Yuki paused for a while. It was probably a lot to take in.

Finally, "Understood."

I watched her step up to the counter, and then, speaking with my voice, ordered the same drink I did.

Speaking with _exactly_ my voice. She'd changed her voice to sound like mine.

God, why had I mentioned tone?

"Nagato," I groaned. Though in all respects, she had completed the task, the cashier was still fixing her with an odd stare. "When I said _tone_, I meant as in manner, not as in pitch!"

Yuki looked strangely at me. "Then say manner."

I sighed. "Honestly, Nagato! How had Asakura managed to act so profoundly normal?"

"She has been among humans for a longer amount of time."

I sighed. Of course.

"Do you wish to leave?"

I looked up.

The look on her face hadn't changed. Her expression showed nothing, her disposition gave nothing away. Nothing about the way she'd said what she'd said was in any way emotive enough to convey the feeling that arose when I heard her say it.

She thought that I was disappointed with her.

I smiled. "Not yet. I told you I'd help you learn how to be more human, didn't I? And you're far from done."

Once again, her expression didn't change. But I could swear I felt happiness in the words that came out next.

"Understood."

The rest of the afternoon was spent going over little details about being human. It was hard to do because she wouldn't tell me what she needed to know. I pretty much had to pick and choose.

"Now, why don't we work on expressions?"

Yuki blinked. "Expressions?"

"Yeah," I nodded. "See, human beings react differently to situations depending on their moods. When you're happy, you smile…" to illustrate my point, I pointed to my mouth, smiling. "…When you're angry, you frown…" again with the pointing "…and when you're sad, you cry…sorry, that's hard to unless I'm actually sad. You know what crying is, right?"

Yuki nodded. "How do I recognize when I am happy, angry, or sad?"

I groaned. "You feel things, don't you? You feel emotions inside, right?"

Yuki shrugged.

I sighed again. "Ok…um…how about physical sensations? If you stub your toe, you feel pain, right?"

Yuki nodded. "Yes."

"Well, when humans feel pain, they make an expression," I explained. "Watch…"

I pinched my arm, and I winced.

"Did you see my face? I made an expression."

Yuki nodded. "I see."

I shrugged. "Well, why don't you show me?"

Yuki nodded. "Alright."

A pause.

I groaned. "Look, I'm not going to pinch you myself. You do it."

Yuki responded by pinching her arm like I did. She reacted to the feeling by closing her eyes.

There it was! A slight tension of her eyebrows! That counted…right?

Right, and I was grasping at straws.

"Interesting."

I blinked. "Huh?"

"That expression coincides with the reaction natural to this body," Yuki said.

I blinked again. "Huh?"

"I had been suppressing the physical reactions this body had been making to various physical stimuli. It had not occurred to me that such action would contribute to natural human behavior."

I blinked. For a third time. "…So…?"

Yuki stared back hard at me. I could tell she wanted to know more.

"What other physical reactions must I emulate?"

I blinked. She was actually learning!

"Well…try smiling at something that makes you happy."

"Such as?"

I blinked. What could she use in this situation?

"Umm…" I pointed at her drink. "Take a sip of that. Tell me if you like it."

She did. And then nodded.

"Well…" I held my arms out. "If you enjoy it, then smile."

Yuki paused. Then the corners of her mouth rose ever so slightly.

It was reward enough for the whole day.

The rest of the day went by in a blur. Yuki seemed never to tire of my instruction. I went through expression after expression. Finally, when the sun went down and we had to part ways.

The next day after class, she actually sought me out before I even made it to the clubroom.

"Nagato…" I blinked. "What is it?"

She paused.

"Do you…want to take another day off?"

She nodded.

I sighed. Maybe I'd bitten off more than I could chew.

We went to the park. Yuki had brought a book by Aristotle with her that contained a list of particular emotions.

Acceptance, agitation, alarm, amusement, anger, angst, annoyance, anticipation, apprehension, apathy, awe, bitterness, boredom, calmness, comfort, contentment, confidence, courage, depression, disappointment, discontentment, disgust, desire, delight, elation, embarrassment, ennui, envy, ecstasy, fear, friendship, frustration, glee, gladness, gratitude, grief, guilt, hate, happiness, homesickness, honor, hope, horror, humility, impatience, irritability, joy, jealousy, kindness, loneliness, love, lust, limerence, modesty, nervousness, negativity, nostalgia, pain, patience, peace, phobia, pity, pride, rage, regret, remorse, resentment, sadness, schadenfreude, self-pity, shame, shyness, sorrow, shock, suffering, surprise, suspense, terror, unhappiness, vulnerability, and worry.

And Yuki wanted to experience them _all_.

"…What?"

I couldn't even _imagine_ Nagato expressing half of those! I mean…Yuki exhibiting schadenfreude? I could see that in Haruhi, maybe, but Yuki? Sometimes it was easy to forget she was an alien. And sometimes it was brutally obvious.

"I don't think I even recognize some of those!" I gaped. "What the heck is ennui?"

Yuki opened her book. "A feeling of weariness and dissatisfaction arising from lack of interest; boredom."

I groaned. I'm pretty sure boredom was already on the list. Perfect. So we also had synonyms to deal with.

"And…" what was that other one? "What in the world is limerence?"

"An involuntary cognitive and emotional state in which a person feels an intense romantic desire for another person."

Great.

"And how am I supposed to make you feel limerence?"

"That, I believe, is what you yourself offered to do yesterday."

I _what_!?

"I'm sorry?"

"Yesterday," Yuki said. "You endeavored to aid me in the task of becoming more human."

Ah. She was being general.

"Well, I don't think there's any way for me to make you feel limerence."

"Why not?" she asked. "Is it not within your capability to do so?"

"Umm…" this was a rather uncomfortable topic. "How do I put this? It's more like…I wouldn't know what to do."

Yuki nodded. "I see…"

She then began to rummage through her bag, before removing a book and handing it to me.

I blinked. "Is this a shoujo manga?"

Yuki nodded.

I sighed. "You can't base your opinions on humanity based off a _manga_!"

She shook her head. "This is not for me. It is for you."

I blinked. "I'm sorry?"

"You said that you wouldn't know what to do," Yuki explained. "Perhaps by reading this, you will have gained the necessary information."

I sighed. "That's not going to help, Nagato. I know _what_ to do, I've just…" I looked away. Why was I embarrassed to tell her I'd never had a girlfriend in my life? "…I've just never done it before."

She nodded. "I see."

That was all the warning I got.

"Naga-!" I yelped, before she pressed her lips to mine.

I just froze. I was pinned to the back of the park bench. What was she doing!? Why was she doing this!? She obviously thought this was what I'd meant when I said I'd never done it before. In fact, I had kissed Haruhi before. We were trapped in negative space, and I had sort of been desperate to snap her out of her reverie. But it had been kind of nice. But did that mean that we were together? Certainly she didn't seem to think so. She still treated me like her slave.

But Nagato…

It's not that I _didn't_ want to go out with Haruhi, but she was just _too_ kooky! I wouldn't have minded going out Mikuru, but that was off limits because of the time differential.

So, wasn't I also forbidden from being romantic with an alien?

Evidently not.

"Nagato…" I broke the contact, gasping for breath. I was sure my face was red. "What are you doing!?"

She just stared back at me, her eyes wide. "A kiss."

I just groaned. "Well, _obviously_ you just kissed me! But why!?"

Yuki touched her lips, a strange look in her eyes. "To experience a physical reaction."

Well, she definitely got a physical reaction out of me!

"Well…just ask next time!" I groaned, my face still red. Have I mentioned that Nagato was not unattractive? Not unattractive at all, if you ask me. In fact, in all truth, she was actually…

"Understood," she said. "Then may I kiss you again?"

…Kinda cute.

"S-sure…" I said, nervously, feeling like I was taking advantage of the situation.

When she pressed her lips to mine a second time, I began to wonder who was taking advantage of whom.

The realization that she was basing this act off the reading of shoujo manga did little to comfort me. Neither did the fact that she wasn't actually human. But at the moment, I just didn't care. Nagato was an adorable girl, and despite our differences, her quirks, her bizarre personality, I liked her. If she wanted me to help her become more human, than damn it, I'd help her. And if she wished to explore these emotions with me…

The thought died as Yuki promptly passed out.

"Nagato!" I gasped, catching her before she fell off the bench. "Hey, Nagato! What's wrong!"

When I realized she was unconscious, I began to panic.

"Nagato! Wake up! Nagato! NAGATO!"

If you asked me today, I couldn't have told you how I'd gotten mixed up with Nagato Yuki. One minute, she showed up in my life, and the next minute, I was kissing her like we were a couple, before watching her pass out before my eyes.

I held her in my arms as I took out my phone, scanning through my address book for Koizumi's number.

There had to be _something_ I could do!

xxxxx

OMAKE!

A/N: Ok, if you've seen Star Trek Generations, then you'll love this. If not, well…enjoy anyway.

Kyon and Yuki sat in the clubroom as Mikuru prepared her usual green tea. She poured Kyon's cup, and he sipped the tea eagerly. She poured Yuki's cup, and she took a sip without so much as looking up form her book.

When she did, however, she took a sharp intake of breath.

Kyon looked up. "Yuki? What's wrong?"

Yuki blinked. "I believe this beverage has produced an emotional response."

Kyon looked startled. "Really? What are you feeling?"

Yuki hesitated, analyzing the drink. "I am uncertain. Because I have had little experience with emotion, and unable to…articulate the sensation…"

Mikuru just looked confused. "E…Emotion?"

Kyon offered her a sympathetic look. "I'll explain later."

Yuki took another sip and pursed her lips. "Oh…"

Mikuru blinked. "Umm…it…kind of looks like she hates it…"

Yuki drew in her breath again. "Yes…that is it…" Giving the cup a good hard stare, she mouthed the words herself. "I _hate_ this…"

Kyon found himself smiling. "Yuki…you're doing it…"

Yuki took another sip, pursing her lips again. "Oh…yes…I _hate_ this…it is _revolting_…"

Mikuru just held up the teapot, meekly. "M…more?"

Yuki held out her cup. "Please."

xxxxx

A/N: Well, here's my first Haruhi fic. And if my preference for Shinji x Rei was any indication, this pairing should be no surprise. Expect something of a plot to emerge in the next chapter.

Read and review!


	2. Chapter 2

**Haruhi Suzumiya Fan Fiction**

**Mythos**

By Kraven Ergeist

Chapter Two

Needless to say, I was freaked out. Worried doesn't even come close to describing it. I mean, watching a friend get sick is one thing, but I had _no_ idea how Yuki functioned. No one did, as far as I knew! We had no idea what could be wrong with her, or what if anything could be done to help her!

Without even thinking, I called Mikuru. As frantic as my voice must have been over the phone, it was a wonder she could even identify my voice.

"K…Kyon?"

"Mikuru! Where are you right now!? We've got an emergency!"

"What? What happened!?"

"It's Nagato! She's collapsed!"

"Yuki!? Is…is she alright!?"

"Of course not! She's unconscious!"

I imagined Mikuru flinching on the other line. "Um…no, I mean…is she still breathing?"

I almost dropped the phone. That hadn't even occurred to me.

"I'll…I'll check…" I glanced down at her prone form. "But, Mikuru…" I lowered my voice. "You know Nagato's an alien, right?"

"A Data Thought Entity, yes…" Mikuru said cutely. As adorable as she sounded, I was a little peeved. What else did the other members of the club know about each other?

"Mikuru…what else do you know about Nagato?"

"That's classified information."

God damn it, I was getting sick of hearing that from her!

"Mikuru, this is an emergency!"

"I'm sorry!" she squealed. "Even in an emergency situation, the best I can do is call my people and request permission to impart information."

I sighed. "How soon can you do that?"

"I can send it out today. I should get a response back immediately."

Right. Because of the time differential.

"In the meantime…why don't you talk to Koizumi?"

I groaned. "I suppose I should. But sometimes I feel like he's even less straightforward than you are."

Again, I could picture her flinching. "Sorry…"

"It's alright," I said, checking Yuki's pulse. It was faint, but still there. "Alright, I'll give Koizumi a call. Call me back as soon as you hear from your people."

"A-Alright…" she stuttered, before hanging.

I sighed, before rifling through my address book again. I might have gotten away with withholding the precise details of Yuki's situation from Mikuru, but Koizumi wouldn't be so easily swayed. He'll be sure to request information, and he was the last person I wanted laughing at me because I rendered an alien immobile via lip contact..

I had to give Koizumi credit though. As much of a prick as he could be sometimes, he was still willing to help. Maybe it was all the times he and Yuki had worked together. What Mikuru couldn't do that those two could was use their powers if need be. Ok, so maybe Mikuru could pull some trick from her sleeve if push came to shove, but thus far, only Koizumi and Yuki have ever demonstrated prowess that you usually see in science fiction films.

Back to the matter at hand, however, after explaining the situation, Koizumi quickly determined that a doctor was out of the question. There was just no guarantee that they'd be able to help, nor was there any guarantee that they wouldn't find something they'd just as well not know. The same went for the school nurse. We also didn't know if Yuki had any contact information should anyone go digging.

We finally agreed on taking her back to her apartment. I'd been there, so I knew the way. Who'd have guessed Yuki didn't lock her door?

"Find her futon," Koizumi commanded, carrying Yuki in his arms. As jealous as that might have made me, I was both too feeble to manage such a feat for more than five minutes and too panicked to care if he got to be the one to hold the girl who, less than an hour ago, had been kissing me in the park.

I touched my lips. I had always been thinking of Yuki as a girl, but every time I really thought about it, it occurred to me that she really wasn't a girl at all. She'd simply chosen to be represented as a female human being. Sure, her body was that of a girl's, but there was no evidence that her actual nature, genetic makeup, or anything was inherently or exclusively female.

But that kiss had felt real. God, it had felt real. I knew I shouldn't be thinking about that right at that moment, but I just couldn't keep my mind off it. I couldn't believe that while my alien friend lay unconscious in my psychic friend's arms, I was still thinking of kissing her. What a terrific friend _I_ was!

Yuki's mattress wasn't hard to find – it made up one of two items she kept in her apartment. After laying it out on the floor, Koizumi draped Yuki down on her back, laying both her hands on her stomach.

I gulped. Why did he have to position her that way? It looked like a wake before a funeral! Couldn't he tell that I was already freaked enough without pondering the possibility that I'd never be speaking to Yuki ever again?

Koizumi kneeled, catching his breath – apparently carrying her around for as long as he had been had taken its toll on him – and looked at me.

"Alright," he said, sternly. "Now tell me exactly what happened."

I kneeled, facing him, with Yuki lying to the side of us. I debated whether or not to admit that we had kissed. Twice. But the truth of the matter was pretty obvious; that it was this very fact that was most likely the cause of this state she was in.

"Well…" I stuttered. "Yesterday, she and I had started to…experiment with human emotions."

Koizumi raised an eyebrow. "Did she ask you, or did you offer?"

I blinked. I wasn't sure if I liked the tone of voice he was hitting.

"I offered first," I admitted, pursing my lips. "But she was pretty adamant about our progress from then on out."

Koizumi nodded. "I see. Then I can already guess what happened."

I blinked. "What?"

"Not much is known about Data Thought Entities," he explained. "All that my agency knows is that they evolve the same way humans do – by gaining knowledge and experience from their surrounding environment. While human's age over a period of sixty years or so, an Entity's lifespan is determined sheerly by their capacity for information. Certain Entities age to be as old as a human, some as old as a galaxy – it all depends on the scope of the environment they're encompassing."

I was blanking. "So…Yuki's…?"

Koizumi sighed. "I'll get to that. I had always assumed that since Yuki's environment was Earth, that her data level was equivalent to that of a human. This thesis was strengthened by her human appearance. She should have a lifespan and growth potential of a normal human being. But her behavior kept baffling me. Though she appears to be functioning as a human, her thought patterns still function like that of an Entity. The Data Thought Entities that my agency have run into have all emulated human behavior, but Yuki does not. Which leads me to one of two conclusions. One: that Yuki was not originally brought up in a human environment and is still adapting. Or two: that Yuki is still premature. It would help if I knew her precise age…"

Something flashed from memory.

"Is three years old young by an…Entity's standards?"

Koizumi blinked. "She told you her age?"

"Earlier, I had a run-in with another Thought Entity – Asakura," I shuddered. "She and Yuki had a…discussion of sorts. Among other things, Yuki's age was mentioned."

Koizumi nodded. "Ah, so Asakura _was_ a Thought Entity after all! I had my suspicions…"

I gritted my teeth. All this talk about Thought Entities was not helping Yuki.

"So, how old is three years of age by an Entity's standards?"

Koizumi shrugged. "If she began her life on Earth, then three years is about as old as a human's level of maturity would be at three years. Since she doesn't function at a toddler's level of capability, I would assume that either she first came into being somewhere else, or that until her higher human functions take control, her Entity functions retain their hold over her natural behavior."

I nodded. It _sort_ of made sense.

"She mentioned that things like facial expressions felt natural, and that she had been suppressing them. I can only assume that she didn't see them as necessary for monitoring Haruhi."

Koizumi nodded. "That would be a reasonable assumption."

"So, do we have any idea what's wrong with her?"

"I can speculate," he admitted. "But with what little we know about her, my best guess would be that something over the course of your…experimentation over-stimulated her data receptors."

"Over-stimulated?"

"Think of an epileptic human being suddenly being bombarded with light," he went on. "They'd go into a seizure, risk damaging their neural pathways, and possibly collapse. That's essentially what has happened to Yuki."

I felt the hard knot that had been growing in my stomach suddenly get really, really big.

"I…I did this to her, didn't I?"

Koizumi stared. "What did you do?"

The heat in my face and the lump at the back of my throat threatened to choke me to death.

"I…she kissed me…"

Koizumi's eyebrows rose. "Really? That was enough to over-stimulate her senses?"

This time, I really did blush. "…Twice."

Koizumi looked like he was ready to laugh. "Well, that doesn't make any sense. After all, a three-year-old kissing someone shouldn't bring out any hormonally driven emotions. Unless the fact that she's a three year old in a teenager's body has something to do with it."

I hated how roundabout Koizumi could be sometimes.

"In any case, all we can do right now is wait," he said, getting to his feet.

"What? Wait!" I exclaimed, un-cramping my legs. "There's got to be _something_ more we can do! Can't your agency contact the other Thought Entities to ask for assistance?"

Koizumi shook his head. "Even if we could, there's no guarantee that they could or would help. We've had encounters here and there, crossing paths while investigating issues that were of interest to them as well, nothing of a professional meeting. Despite our best attempts at diplomacy, Thought Entities simply do not interact with humans who do not fit into their overall objective. Thought Entities are task driven creatures, and it's entirely possible that the very idea of an alien life form contributing to their task would simply escape them."

God, my brain hurt! If what Koizumi was saying was correct, than Yuki receiving my help was…but wait, she had already requested my help to some extent. But that was because, for some reason or another, I was this crucial ingredient in monitoring Haruhi.

My cell phone vibrated in my pocket and I flipped it open.

It was Mikuru!

"Kyon…" her tiny voice said in a hurried pace. "I…I got clearance. I have a complete recording here of all our knowledge of Data Thought Entities."

I sighed. "Wonderful! Is there anything pressing, or can it wait till we get to you?"

"Um…no, not really…" she muttered. "Are you with Koizumi?"

"Yeah," I replied. I handed the phone over to him, and he related everything he had deduced with Mikuru.

"I see…" he said, calmly. "Well then there might be something I can do then. Yeah. We're still at Yuki's place. Do you know where it is? Ok, swing by and we'll talk."

He ended the call.

"So, what did she say?"

Koizumi paused for a moment, debating something with himself. Finally, he turned to look at me.

"Kyon, listen – I have a theory: Data Thought Entities function normally on a higher plain of existence than we do. Their data, their 'bodies' as we might think of them, exist in a parallel universe from ours. Mikuru didn't know all the details, but her people seem to think that while inhabiting a physical form, their 'minds' would stay in touch with their 'bodies' on this higher plain."

I was starting to lose brain cells. "So?"

This time, Koizumi did laugh. I was about ready to punch him!

"So, while Yuki's body may be non-functioning, her mind is still probably right where she left it – on this higher plain of existence. So, getting to it should be a simple matter of opening the right gate at the right time."

I nearly swallowed my tongue. Koizumi's ability allowed him to cross plains of reality or something like that, so he could cross the bridge between Yuki's world and ours. Or at least, that's what I got out of it.

But there was a drawback – like he said, 'right gate at the right time.' It would be weeks, months before that could happen!

Koizumi frowned. "But suppose we do, and suppose me manage to find her, what then? I mean, overlooking the fact that we'll be communing with a body of raw data, what if she has nothing to offer us? What if find ourselves at an impasse?"

"Then we'll have done all we could do," I said. "But I think we should at least find out, don't you?"

"Indeed."

"Great," I ran my fingers through my hair. "So, you'll figure out where and when the next bridge between our worlds pops up?"

He grinned. "As long as you're willing to be the one to go into it."

I blinked. "Huh? Why me?"

"If we're to maximize this event, I must remain outside to stabilize the field for as long as possible. I could ask Mikuru to do it, but…"

I grunted. If it would help Yuki…

"Fine then."

Koizumi smiled at me. "You like her, don't you?"

I made a face. "Shut up."

He laughed again. "You better not let Haruhi know. She'll throw a fit."

"Why would I tell Haruhi that one of her club members just happens to be an alien and is having an out of body experience?"

"Not about that," his infuriating eyes boring holes through me. "That you like Yuki."

I crossed my arms. "Look, it's not like that, ok? Things just got out of hand. She just wanted to know what emotions were like, that's all. For God's sake, she was basing her notions of love out of shoujo manga!"

"Well, that would be her way."

I groaned. He was obviously not buying it. And I wasn't sure I believed it myself.

"Listen, _she_ kissed _me_, alright? There's no way that I'd try something like that with Yuki! She's an alien, for crying out loud!"

"Well, her body's certainly human."

"That's not the issue!"

"But it is a factor."

"Damn right it is!" I glared back at him. "If she hadn't been so desperate to try to understand it better, none of this would have happened!"

"Alright, alright, calm down," Koizumi said. "None of this is your fault."

Well, it certainly felt like it was my fault. We both fell silent for a while until we heard a knock at the door. I opened it and Mikuru came in.

"Good, you're here," I said, gesturing her in.

"Where's Yuki?"

"This way."

She knelt down besides Yuki's futon and Mikuru eyes began to get teary.

"Are you sure she's alright?"

"Yes," Koizumi said. "She's in the equivalent of a coma."

Mikuru flinched, tensing even more. I touched Mikuru's shoulder, throwing Koizumi a dirty look. A_ coma_ didn't exactly strike me as _alright_!

Koizumi explained his idea to Mikuru and she listened, her eyes constantly on Yuki's prone form.

"I…I don't really understand Closed Space," Mikuru said. "But I'm not sure your plan will work. Closed Space is just one among an infinite number of parallel universes. Yuki could be in something entirely unrelated."

Koizumi didn't answer. Instead, he pulled out his phone, which seemed to be vibrating, and answered it.

"Hi, thanks for getting back to me. Uh huh. Yeah, a Data Thought Entity. Yes, I know we don't know that much, I just want to know if it will work."

Mikuru and I exchanged glances, but were otherwise silent.

"Uh huh. I see. Alright, thank you. No, I don't think that will be necessary. Alright, I explain it to him. Bye."

Koizumi flipped his phone closed.

"Well, the good news is, it should theoretically be possible. The bad news is, it's never been done before, so we're on our own for this one."

I groaned. "What about all that knowledge that just appeared in your head that day you got your powers."

Koizumi shrugged. "I only received knowledge on the nature of Closed Space. As far as alternate inter-dimensional travel goes, I'm as clueless as your are. I'm sorry, Kyon. But I just don't think there's anything I can do."

I balled my hands into fists. "Damn it…Mikuru, was there anything else your people could tell you?"

She shook her head. "No. Koizumi's report was adequate. I was just instructed not to let this interfere with Haruhi Suzumiya."

Koizumi nodded. "That was also one of my instructions."

I sighed. I was worried that they'd say that. Because that was precisely what I was about to do.

The very next day, I approached Haruhi before class (Or rather, she tracked me down like a trained hunting dog and talked my ear off for blowing off SOS Brigade for two days in a row).

In the end, I didn't get a chance to talk to her during the school day. I had to wait for club to start.

By the time I got there, Haruhi and Mikuru were there already. We'd left Yuki at her apartment, and Koizumi, Mikuru and I exchanging watch cycles. Koizumi's turn would end later this evening.

"This is seriously becoming a problem," Haruhi noted. "I'm going to have to call a staff meeting to discuss the penalties for recurring absenteeism."

"Haruhi," I said, drawing her attention from the computer. "I was meaning to talk to you about that."

She threw me a glance. "What about it? I can't demote you any further, Kyon, so cleanup duty is the only method of penance."

I didn't let her throw me off. "Yuki's an alien."

Haruhi just blinked.

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Mikuru on the verge of panicking, waving her arms around, and shaking her head. If I'd been looking directly at her, I might have been inclined to stop. But I kept going.

"She's an alien posing as a human being, and she suddenly got sick, and her mind is now somewhere on an alternate plain of existence. Now, Koizumi might be able to open a rift between dimensions because he's an ESPer. But he can't, since he hasn't learned that particular type of ESP. So, what we need to you to do is provide Koizumi with that information."

I was surprised Haruhi hadn't interrupted me. Maybe it was the way I'd held my face so straight. Truth be told, inside, I was panicked. If anything Koizumi told me was true, then the world might end a lot sooner than I'd had planned.

But I was desperate.

"And I suppose Mikuru over there is a time traveler?"

I glanced over at said upper classman just in time to see her eyes nearly bug out of her head.

"You guessed it."

I didn't know how Mikuru hadn't passed out by now. Haruhi's pause was enough to make me sweat through my shirt. I felt like on the inside, I was very much reacting in the same way Mikuru appeared to be reacting: with abject terror.

"Hmm! Nice try, Kyon! You're not gonna weasel out of clean-up duty just by pretending to have found our mysterious beings right here in our own clubroom!"

I sighed. Perfect!

"Seriously, though! You could have made a more convincing story than by picking on your own club members! A little professional courtesy would go a long way for you, Kyon! I might have been convinced if you'd have said Asakura was an alien who suddenly went home, or if the computer club president was sucked into an alternate dimension or something!"

I flinched. Now why did that have the particular ring of truth to it?

"But I mean, come on! Yuki may be a little odd, but she's hardly an alien! She's just the silent, stoic type of the club! And Koizumi's our mysterious transfer student, not some ESPer! And Mikuru here…"

She got to grab a hold of her face, bunching up her cheeks. Mikuru reacted accordingly by tensing up, shutting her eyes in hope of blocking her out.

"She's our cute little busty upper classman who likes to dress up in sexy costumes! Now stop dilly-dallying and get to work, Kyon! Honestly…"

I smiled. That had gone better than expected. Now all that was left to do was wait out the day and hope that Koizumi went easy on me.

Well, the former came to pass at least.

"Kyon, I'm really disappointed in you," he said sternly, once Mikuru and I had arrived at Yuki's apartment. "Do you _want_ this world to end? That was too big a risk, Kyon! I know you want to save Yuki, but you have to understand, keeping Haruhi content comes first! For me, for Mikuru, even for Yuki herself!"

I cringed, looking down at Yuki's still body. There hadn't been any change in her since yesterday.

"Do you think she'd condone what you did?"

I shook my head. "No. But it worked, didn't it?"

Koizumi looked pissed. Mikuru just looked confused.

"What do you mean, Kyon?" she asked.

"I mean, Haruhi is the reason you all are here right now," I said. "She's the reason you all have the powers you were granted three years ago. So, it's well within her ability to modify Koizumi's power to accommodate what we need to do."

Mikuru blinked. "But…she…she didn't believe you!"

"I know," I smiled. "It's like Koizumi said. As quirky as she is, Haruhi is a reasonable human being. So of course she didn't believe a word I said. But it doesn't matter – the thought is still there in her subconscious mind. She granted all of your powers subconsciously, giving her the very idea was enough to grant Koizumi the ability to transcend the dimension between our world and Yuki's.

Koizumi furrowed his brow. "You know, I'm really tempted not to go through with this, simply not to reinforce this sort of behavior in you, Kyon. Our agency doesn't owe any particular debt to the Data Thought Entities. I don't _have_ to do this, you know?"

I glared back at him. "I'm not even going to dignify that with an answer, Koizumi. You're not doing this for me, you're doing this for her. You're doing this to help Yuki – not to settle some debt or to satisfy Haruhi's little pet gopher – me – you're doing this because Yuki is your friend."

Koizumi's expression was anything but kind.

"Oh yeah," I added, "And you're also doing this because you know that the longer Yuki remains absent from the SOS Brigade, the less and less content Haruhi will become."

He sighed. "Fine. You win this round, Kyon. Now go sit over by Yuki's head."

I blinked. "You can do it right now?"

Koizumi glared back at me. "Do you want me to do it or not?"

I didn't hesitated. "Alright, alright! I'm going!"

I did as instructed, sitting at the head of Yuki's futon.

"Now place your hands on her forehead."

I did that as well.

"Now, try to relax," he said. "This will feel a little weird."

He scooted over to us and placed his hands over mine on her forehead.

"Good luck, Kyon!" Mikuru said, nervously.

I smiled back at her.

"Oh, and Kyon?"

I looked up at Koizumi.

"You'd better come back."

I blinked. "Huh?"

And then, I was gone.


	3. Chapter 3

**Haruhi Suzumiya Fan Fiction**

**Mythos**

By Kraven Ergeist

Chapter Three

For a moment, I thought I had woken up from a bad dream. I lifted my head off the clubroom table, and saw Mikuru darning a scarf, saw Koizumi putting the Othello board away, saw Haruhi tinkering at the computer, saw Yuki reading by the window…

I looked at Koizumi and blinked. "Was I asleep?"

He turned to me, smiled and shrugged his shoulders, but otherwise said nothing.

I blinked and turned to look at Mikuru. "How long was I out?"

She said nothing. She just smiled at me and continued knitting her scarf.

I blinked. "What's going on here?"

"There is insufficient data to replicate their exact responses, so their vocal functions have not been activated."

The voice had been Yuki's. But it hadn't come from Yuki, at least, not the one sitting by the window. Her lips hadn't moved. But the voice had come from everywhere, it resounded throughout the entire room.

That moment I mentioned earlier where I thought I'd woken up from a dream? Yeah, that was pretty much over by now.

"Yuki?" I called out, getting to my feet. I paced around the room, touching each of the club members by the shoulder, and each of them, even Haruhi, only reacted by smiling at me and continuing to do what they were doing. "What's going on? Where am I? Are we in your mind?"

The Yuki reading by the window turned her head towards me. Though her lips didn't move, I still heard her voice.

"You may think of it as such. This is the compendium of all the data I've been able to obtain during my stay in your realm. As you can see, it is still incomplete."

I stood over what should have been Yuki reading by the window as I tried to regain my bearings.

"What…what happened yesterday? When you…when you kissed me?"

"After we performed the kiss, all of my human functions were shut down."

Obviously.

"Why?"

"Because I chose to."

Ok, that one wasn't my first guess.

"What? Why?"

"It was the only viable option," Yuki's voice echoed. "In my time gathering data on your plain, I sought to gain as much knowledge as was necessary to become as human as physically possible. I arrived at the conclusion that this was a futile endeavor."

"Why?"

Suddenly, the clubroom around me vanished.

I staggered for a moment, before I realized where I'd been taken: just outside the school building. But it looked just the way it did that time Haruhi and I got sucked into closed space.

Then I saw the lurking giants of light and I froze.

"Yuki? What's going on here!?"

I took a few steps back before realizing the giant was heading my direction. I looked to where it was going and I saw two familiar figures.

I blinked, before realizing who they were.

"Haruhi…" I voiced. My mouth refused to speak the name of the other, but it was me. Haruhi and I. Or at least, a copy of Haruhi and I. And I knew exactly what was about to happen.

I kissed her. And then the world vanished.

The world around me disappeared and I found myself back in the clubroom, this time, with only Yuki.

"I have sampled data from all fields of human venture," Yuki's voice said. "Academia, politics, economics, entertainment, science, architecture…all of it could be quantified, all of it could be summarized. All of the functions adhered to patterns that could be broken down and stored for data. But the core of human behavior, the synapses that fire in the human nervous system, the cognitive persona that makes you human…it eluded me. The closest calculations could only be broken down to generalizations, averages and trend lines."

I stared in utter confusion. "What are you saying?"

"Based on what I've gained on human interaction, intersexual relationships generally adhered to monogamous pairings. When you performed a kiss with Haruhi, I had assumed that such a pairing had taken place. This was a good thing – it would entail Haruhi's continued satisfaction."

The Yuki I could see turned her head, but her lips still refused to move.

"But then, you and I kissed…"

I caught myself blushing. "It wasn't that big of a deal. You should know from all that shoujo manga you read that, uh…human pairing is constantly shifting."

Yuki's head nodded.

"Yes. At first, I had overlooked this as simple flaws in human character. But when I considered the emotions involved, the natural human reactions in my own body…I came to the conclusion that this course of action could not continue."

"Why?"

Yuki remained still, her voice silent, though something about her complexion looked troubled.

"The degree of reaction I felt at our kissing was significant. And it brought about a dynamic series of revelations. The realization that the action entailed a deep mutual emotional significance intrigued me. It startled me when I realized that already, subconscious desires had begun forming in the body which previously had been entirely under my control."

I blushed as it dawned on me what she was implying. "Um, that's…that's nothing to be afraid of, Yuki. That's just part of what it means to be human."

Yuki shook her head as her voice went on. "There is more. The fact remained clear that while you and I share that deep emotional significance, you also shared emotional significance with Asahina Mikuru, and more importantly, with Haruhi Suzumiya."

I stared, aghast. "Are you telling me that you're jealous of Haruhi?"

"What I am telling you that if I were continue to exist, with these physical reactions escalating at the level that they are, there is a risk that the natural urges of this body might momentarily seize control in a volatile situation. Should that happen, Haruhi's reaction will be incalculable. There would be no telling what she might do."

I blinked. Was she saying that her own, human emotions were a liability to monitoring Haruhi?

"But still…" I breathed. "Just because there's a risk doesn't mean you need to cease existing as you did until yesterday. All you have to do is ask, and Mikuru, Koizumi and I will be able to keep anything you do under wraps."

"There is another, less pertinent reason for choosing this inevitability," Yuki's voice resounded. "The sensation evoked from the very idea of our connection causing trouble induces a very unpleasant feeling. It is…the word you would use is _pain_."

My mouth was dry. "Pain? This…being together hurts you?"

"Inexplicably so. Vastly more so than the damage inflicted on me by Asakura even."

This I understood. Yuki was not a creature of emotions. And while she had been prepared for physical pain, such that her fight with Asakura hadn't hurt at all, she was not prepared for emotional pain, because she simply didn't understand emotion.

"I have concluded that to be human, one must not only understand this pain, but embrace it. I cannot. I am unable even to understand a pain that stems from emotions, for I am unable to understand emotions at all. In this, I came to the realization that the unknown aspect of human behavior that eluded came from these emotions. Just as with you shifting your pairing between Haruhi and myself, human beings are entirely inconsistent. You are entirely immeasurable, unquantifiable, and unreliable because of your emotions."

Yuki turned her eyes downwards.

"I am a being of data. Precision and accuracy are the yin and yang of my existence. Without measurement, without quantification, without consistency, I am nothing. I am entirely incapable of understanding humanity, and due to the very nature of my makeup, I will never be able to."

I was lost for words. She seemed to have argued herself into a hole, with no way for me to dig her out.

"So…you won't come back with me?"

Yuki shook her head, her voice still a thought in the air.

"Haruhi's going to notice," I said. "You'll be missed."

"Another Data Thought Entity shall take my place."

"You'll still be missed," I said, strongly.

Yuki's eyes flickered and I could tell that she got my meaning.

"Kyon…" her voice said, quietly as ever. "You should return to your plain of existence. I imagine Koizumi's hold over the bridge between our world is losing strength."

I shook my head. "I'm not going without you, Nagato."

Yuki nodded. "Then you leave me no choice."

My heart caught in my throat as I moved before I could think. In the space where I had just been, Yuki had placed her hands on a desk, which shimmered and disappeared.

"N-Nagato!?" I yelped, stepping away from her. "What are you doing? Are you trying to kill me!?"

"No," she whispered, her unspeaking body approaching me steadily. "I will purge your data from our plain of existence. You will be forced back into your own world."

I idly wondered if that desk she had touched had suddenly reappeared in Yuki's apartment next to my body and what Koizumi and Mikuru thought of it.

I reacted a bit too slowly after Yuki's next attack, and I instinctively grabbed her by the wrists before her hands could touch me.

I grunted. For a girl this size, she was incredibly powerful, but I reminded myself that this wasn't her body.

"If you do not return, Haruhi will be greatly upset," Yuki's voice echoed. "You must return, Kyon."

I glared back at her. "I told you…I'm not leaving without you, Yuki!"

At the use of her first name, I saw her eyes flicker again, the tension in her arms weakening. I leapt at the chance and pushed away from her, dashing out of the clubroom door and barreling down the hall.

Though her body simply walked towards me, Yuki's voice was everywhere.

"I control all the data in this sector, Kyon. Running is useless."

Then, just as I turned a corner in the hallway, her body appeared out of nowhere, standing before me.

"Gah!" I recoiled in shock, falling back on my haunches.

"You must go back, Kyon," Yuki's voice said.

I scrambled to my feet and dashed in the other direction.

It was like a scene out of a horror movie. Yuki would just appear where she pleased. I couldn't escape her. Outside the school, she was there. Out on the street, she was there. No matter where I ran, she followed. She wasn't even trying to touch me. She was just appearing where ever I went.

She was trying to persuade me to go willingly, I realized. She must not have wanted our last moments together to be one of discontent.

Well, I could take advantage of that. She said that this was a compendium of all her knowledge that she'd gained of our world. Which meant that every bit of reality was her domain. But it also meant that it could only consist of places that she knew. Which meant that there was one place I knew that she couldn't.

It was a gamble. Either it would be blocked off, or…

I was running full out, down the street, with Yuki appearing at every corner, her voice simply repeating that phrase, "You must go back, Kyon."

When I'd reached my destination, I shot her visage a defiant look.

"I told you…" I reached forward and opened the door. "I'm not leaving without you!"

I stepped through my front door.

And into nothingness.

Yuki had never been to my house before. So she could have no knowledge of what was inside. Which meant either it would be closed off, the same way the walls around closed space were, or it would open up to the rest of the Data Thought Entity world.

Based on the enormous white expanse of nothing, I was willing to believe the latter.

Of course, now I was even more screwed. Yuki had no control here, and I was an alien amongst whatever Data Thought Entities I encountered. I had no idea what anyone (could Thought Entities be considered "ones?") would do should they run into me.

Would they kill me?

"Kyon?"

It was a voice I recognized, but I wasn't sure from where.

"It _is_ you, isn't it?"

Suddenly, the whiteness around me turned into a classroom.

And then I saw a familiar sheen of blue hair, and suddenly my heart was in my throat.

"A-Asakura!?"

It was the exact same classroom she had sealed off to try to kill me. If Yuki hadn't interfered back then, I wouldn't have made it.

Stupid, stupid, stupid! Now Yuki was in no position to help me!

"Long time no see," the former class rep said.

I took a step back. "Are you going to kill me?"

She shrugged. "Now why would I do that? It's not like killing you will have any effect on Haruhi Suzumiya. Under the current circumstances, I can just leave things as they are to achieve the exact same effect."

She giggled cutely. I was _so_ not falling for it.

"Besides," she said, "Things are just too interesting now! I mean, you and Yuki? I'd have never guessed you'd show any interest in her. I suppose you feel like you owe her some kind of debt?"

I frowned. "What's it to you? I just want her to come home."

Asakura grinned. "But she _is_ home."

"You know what I mean! _My_ home."

Asakura just sighed. "Well, have you really considered Yuki's feeling on the matter?"

I blinked. "What?"

Asakura paced the confines of the room, running her hands over the wood of the chairs.

"Yuki's only had three years to mature on your world. But we needed someone who was most likely to interact with Haruhi, so she had to be her equivalent age. This isn't how things normally go, so she's going through some rather complicated experiences. Normally, she would have had twelve more years to mature and compound her knowledge, but in her current state, she's confused and scared, and you're only making things worse by coming here."

I held my arms out. "But how was I supposed to help her if I couldn't even _talk_ to here!?"

"It's not your responsibility to help her."

I grabbed Asakura by the shoulders. "Yes it is!"

Her eyes widened, and something told me I'd just given away far more than I should have.

"Oh my…you really _do_ have feelings for her, don't you?"

I took my hands off her. "I…I don't know. Damn it, this was supposed to be simple! We were just supposed to explore her emotions, this wasn't supposed to turn into a matter of whether or not she'll even be with us anymore!"

Asakura smiled. "But do you like her?"

I groaned. "I told you, I don't know! But…I would have at least like to have been given the chance to find out!"

For a while, she said nothing at all. I noticed that while Yuki's voice had come from nowhere, Asakura had chosen to speak through her own body.

"Asakura?" I asked. "How is it that you acted so convincingly normal, while Yuki's always had to struggle? Is it just because you're older?"

She nodded. "Indeed. Thought Entities exist on a higher plain of existence than carbon based life forms, but we are able to interact with those on lower dimensions, if in a limited way. Imagine, if you will, a two dimensional world of two dimensional life forms. They exist on what would be the equivalent of a sheet of paper. Now, in order for you to interact with them, you could, say, stamp your thumb into some ink and make a thumbprint. This would be your two dimensional representation in this two dimensional world. The Nagato Yuki that you know is merely a thumbprint of what she truly is. To us, you are like drawings on a sheet of paper. Which is why monitoring Haruhi Suzumiya is so important. Somehow, her existence is tied in with all levels of reality, and all of existence is potentially at her beck and call."

I sat down in one of the chairs. "So killing me, to you, was like little more than erasing a drawing on a sheet of paper."

She nodded. "Yes. But at the moment, I am no longer inclined to _erase_ you, as you put it."

I groaned. "Cause it wouldn't serve a purpose?"

"No," she smiled. "Because it would make Yuki sad."

I blinked. "Huh?"

"You said that you'd like to be given the chance to find out whether or not you liked her?"

All I could do was nod.

Asakura smiled. "Good. I've been in communiqué with her since forming this data sector. I have told her that you will agree to return to your world once your conditions are met."

I just gapped. "What conditions?"

But Asakura just disappeared. In her place was Yuki.

"Nagato…" I breathed.

She turned her eyes up to meet mine, and this time, spoke through her mouth.

"Kyon," she said. "Asakura said that once your conditions were met, you would return to your world?"

I frowned. So, Asakura hadn't told her either. Figured.

"Yes," I said, getting to my feet.

"What were your conditions?"

"I'm not sure," I said, stepping over to her.

I could have been dreaming, but I could have sworn she was blushing at my approach. Maybe it was the ambient light from outside the window. Why Asakura had made it into sunset was beyond me. Maybe she just wanted to set the mood. Despite their rivalry in the past, she seemed to display some sort of sisterly affection towards Yuki.

Or maybe I was just imagining things. Who was I to analyze the inner workings of an alien?

"Now, why don't you explain to me again…why don't you want to come back with me?"

Yuki didn't make eye contact. "I would risk disrupting Suzumiya Haruhi's resolve. She displays a distinct interest in you, and my presence would only serve to hinder the progress of this pattern."

"And why is that?"

"Because when I am in your presence, my body behaves…strangely…" Finally, she made eye contact. "Even now, I find it difficult not to continue our…experimentation from before…"

God, why did she have to be so cute!?

"Unless I am able to obtain complete control over my actions, I cannot allow myself to interfere with you or Haruhi. And I cannot hope to completely my human guise until I do."

I just shook my head. "Nagato, being a human means being subject to those sorts of urges. You can't hope to have full and complete control a hundred percent of the time. Not if you hope to be human."

"I am not human," she said simply. "I am a Data Thought Entity. More to the point, you and Haruhi are both human, and more suited for each other."

"Listen," I said. "Haruhi may have some bizarre interest in me. God knows, I don't see it, but even if she does…have you considered that I might be interested in someone else?"

This time, Yuki did blush. I was sure of it!

"That would be…unwise…"

"So be unwise!" I cried. "Humans are fallible by nature! But we still manage to live our lives. We can't just give up because we can't stand our own weaknesses."

"I am unable to comply with this," Yuki said. "I am a Data Thought Entity, my virtues are precision and accuracy. Any being that does not adhere to this structure is beyond my ability to comprehend."

That's when it hit me.

"Listen," I said. "Asakura said that Data Thought Entities exist on a higher plain of existence. That means that you're infinitely more complex than we are. But it also means that human beings are infinitely simpler. You're overcomplicating what should be a simple matter."

Yuki blinked. "I fail to comprehend."

I shook my head. It was just so obvious! How had I missed it?

"You don't _need_ to understand or even control your emotions in order to be human! You don't need to be quantifiable or consistent or accurate or precise! You don't need to change one iota from the way you were the first moment I laid eyes on you!"

Yuki still clearly did not understand.

"Until you revealed your true nature, Nagato, I had thought you to be human. And you were plenty unquantifiable as far as I could see. You were clearly inconsistent with the rest of the club. I could sooner understand Haruhi than understand _you_, Nagato!"

She still did not reply.

"All this time, you were reading those books, trying to understand what it meant to be human… But all along, it was _reading_ those books that made you human!"

Had I not been keenly focused on her, I would have missed the sharp intake of breath.

"You don't have to have some form of knowledge or understanding to be a human being! You just need to _be_! To be yourself! To be an individual! To me, to everyone that knows you, Nagato Yuki is a quiet, soft-spoken _human_ girl who likes to read and play computer games. That's all you _need_ to be, Nagato! You only need to be who you are!"

I was gasping now, staring her in the face.

"And that's all _I_ need from you, Nagato. We all do. We all need our Nagato Yuki to come back and sit in her spot by the window and to keep reading. Because that's who you are! And that's…that's the girl that I want to get to know better. That's the girl that I want to spend more time, go the library with, to sit and eat and drink with at the cafeteria…that's all I want, Nagato…"

For a while, she was silent. We simply sat there, facing each other. My breath was slowing down, and I was beginning to wonder if anything I'd said had affected her.

Finally, she opened her mouth. "Kyon…I-"

"Your conditions have been met," a taunting voice said.

And all at once, my heart sank.

"Wait!" I shouted getting to my feet. "No!"

I reached out for Yuki, who was staring back at me with confused eyes. Her hand came up, and I was close, just barely close enough to brush our fingertips together.

I could hear Asakura giggling in the background. "You said that you'd return once you figured out how much you cared about Yuki. From what I can see, you've definitely reached a decision."

Suddenly my whole body was yanked backwards, and I felt Yuki's fingertips disappear.

"No!" I shouted. "Nagato!"

I felt myself fall backwards, out of nothingness, and Yuki was staring back at me, watching me disappear, the look on her face an unmistakable expression of sorrow.

All at once, I was awake again, back in the real world, gasping for breath. My hands, sticky with sweat, released from Yuki's forehead, and I recoiled backwards, my back thudding against the far wall.

I could see Mikuru suddenly flinch as I awoke, and Koizumi panting, sweat dripping down his forehead.

"No!" I gasped, my voice hoarse and raspy for some reason. "Send me back! I almost reached her!"

Koizumi held up his hand. "Kyon…I've exhausted my reserves. Please, we can try again later."

"No!" I shouted, grabbed him by the shoulders. "She was just about to tell me! Please, you have to send me back! Now!"

"Kyon…" Mikuru stuttered. "You've been gone for over an hour. Koizumi's power wasn't meant to last that long."

I was still gasping for breath. I hung my head in defeat. "I was so close…so close to finally reaching…"

Then a familiar voice broke me out of my slump.

"Kyon…"

It couldn't be. It couldn't happen just like that, could it!? Surely, it was just a trick! For all I knew, Asakura was still messing with my head. Maybe she hadn't actually sent me back, but just to another data representation-

"Kyon…"

I turned around. And sure enough, there she was, lifting her head off the pillow to take in her surroundings.

"Nagato!" I shouted, dropping to my knees before her, taking her by the shoulders. "Oh, thank God, Nagato…"

She wasn't looking at me, she was still eying her surroundings, as if unsure of where she was. "I am…at my apartment…?"

Mikuru suddenly threw her arms around the girl. "Nagato! I'm so glad you're back! We were all so worried!"

Koizumi snickered from behind me. "Some of us more than others."

I ignored him. "How did you make it back? I thought you'd decided to stay in your own world?"

She finally turned her eyes towards mine. "I did."

I looked down as her hand reached out to grab hold of mine.

"It would seem that I was…inconsistent?"

I could only sigh with relief. She had decided to stay! All the shock and worry about the thought of losing hold of her suddenly fell from my shoulders, and I just collapsed, wrapping my arms tightly around her.

"Thank you…" I whispered.

I might have imagined it, but I could swear that I felt her arms tighten around me.

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Mikuru fidgeting uneasily. "Um…we can leave if you want…"

Koizumi sighed. "Are you sure we should? I'm not entirely sure that's a good idea."

"Koizumi," I said sternly, turning around to look him in the eye.

He stared me down, ready to take on a stream of insults.

"Thank you for helping me," I said, suddenly smiling.

That caught the guy off guard. "I…uh…you're welcome…"

Yuki nodded. "I would like to thank you too."

Koizumi scratched his head. "Well, what else are ESPers for? Besides, thanks to Kyon's little stunt, my entire agency now knows how to travel to Data Thought Entity space. I imagine our two kinds will be meeting more regularly from now on, won't we, Nagato?"

"Yes," she said with a nod.

"Umm…" Mikuru interjected. "Koizumi…don't you think we should get going?"

He just shrugged. "Should we? I don't exactly think we should leave these two alone together."

"Koizumi!" Mikuru shouted cutely, her eyes squeezed shut. The use of the "kun" at the end of his name only made it sound cuter.

"Right, right, let's go," he said, getting to his feet. Mikuru herded him out the door, before turning to bow her head, whispering "ganbatte" before fleeing in embarrassment.

Just what exactly did she think Yuki and I had planned anyway!?

"Kyon…"

I turned to look at the girl I'd just gone to the ends of the Earth and beyond to get back.

"Nagato…" I smiled. "What…what made you come back?"

She just blinked. "The…_pain_ I mentioned before…the pain I felt at the thought of our union becoming a problem…"

I nodded. "Yeah?"

"I…I felt it again," she said, barely above a whisper. "Just as you left. And it continued to grow with your continued absence. So I decided to return."

I stared at her. "Just like that?"

Yuki nodded. "Yes."

I sighed. She was still lying down on her futon, and I was still kneeling by her side. I wasn't sure what to do at the point.

So I kept talking.

"You remember, back when we first met, you invited me over to your apartment?"

Yuki nodded.

"I didn't know what to expect," I said, my cheeks starting to feel warmer. "But a part of me was entertaining the idea that you had…well…that you were planning on confessing or something…"

Yuki blinked. "Confessing to what?"

I sighed. "You know…confessing your feelings."

Yuki's eyes fluttered, which I'd learned was as close as she got to, what with Mikuru, would be an all out gasp of surprise.

"Were you considering…experimenting with human emotion?"

I blushed. "I…yeah…"

"I see…"

I sighed, looking away. "I was sort of…playing with the idea of doing that right now, actually…"

Yuki nodded, lowering her eyes. "I see. Then you may."

I blinked, looking straight at her face, which was lowered. And this time it was dark out – it wasn't a trick of the light. She was definitely blushing.

I kissed her.

"I'm glad you're back, Nagato…"

I felt her arms encircle my shoulders as she returned the kiss.

"Call me Yuki."


	4. Epilogue

**Haruhi Suzumiya Fan Fiction**

**Mythos**

By Kraven Ergeist

Epilogue

I sighed, closing down the "Day of Sagittarius III" game software. They say humility is the key to enlightenment, but after losing this much to Nagato Yuki, I should be the next incarnation of the Dalai Lama. She claimed she was only operating at fifty percent capacity, but that was still probably fifty times the speed I was able to function at.

It was just a game, I knew, but Yuki enjoyed playing it, so I sucked it up, and took my losses like the fool I was.

Yuki nodded to me from across the table, stationed at her own laptop (one of four that Haruhi pilfered from the Computer Club not so long ago).

"You are finished playing?"

I tried not to sound like a sore loser. "A guy can only take so many losses at once. You need to give me some time to catch my breath."

Yuki nodded. "I see. Perhaps we should play a game in which the odds are more in your favor."

I rolled my eyes. "I don't think there's a game like that anywhere in this world. Any game can be broken down into a set of rules, and you can instantly follow that set of rules down to the letter."

Yuki nodded. "Correct."

"Even games like _Jan-Ken_ or _Dare-Da_ are in your favor," I went on. "You can analyze voice patterns and accurately predict my hand gestures, and win every time."

I could swear I heard something akin to mischievousness in Yuki's voice. "I see."

I groaned and got up out of my chair and sat at the chair by the main computer and fiddled around. Yuki settled into her usual seat, flipping open her current book – it seemed she was still plowing through Aristotle's book on emotions.

"Hey Yuki," I said, drawing her eyes from her book. "Do you know what mythos are?"

"An underlying system of beliefs, especially those dealing with supernatural forces, characteristic of a particular cultural group."

I sighed. Right out of the dictionary.

"It's cultural heritage," I explained. "Myths, legends and stories passed down from one generation to the next. It's what makes a certain group or civilization stand out."

"I see," Yuki said, going back to her book.

I cleared my throat, trying to get her attention again. "I just thought it was ironic that Haruhi's so fascinated by strange and mysterious beings, but she's specifically focus on such archetypical things like aliens, time travelers, and ESPers. I mean, every culture on Earth has some kind of legend or story about things like that. So even if they're mysterious or strange, they're still fundamentally human."

"I see."

"You're really not interested, are you?" I rolled my eyes. I had been up thinking about it all night!

"It's an interesting conundrum."

That did it. I got up out of the commander's seat and stepped up to her. Yuki stared up at me with a puzzled expression, before I snatched the book right out of her hands, placed it on the windowsill, and leaned in to kiss her.

All she did in response was tilt her head back.

Call me shameful, but I felt entitled to _some_ amount of attention, and besides – she just looked so adorable sitting there with her nose in her book.

I stood back up and smiled down at her. She in return fixed me with her usual quizzical look.

"What was that for?"

I just laughed as I returned to the commander's chair. "Oh…no reason…"

She paused for a moment, before getting up and grabbing her book.

"You already succeeded in demonstrating limerance."

My heart sank for a brief moment. "So…does that mean you don't want to kiss anymore?"

"There are still plenty of emotions left to experiment, and quite a few that involve kissing."

I smiled. "Okay…what did you have in mind?"

Yuki just blinked twice. Then she pulled something I would have never expected her to try. She walked up to me and pushed my chair back on its rear legs, balancing it on the back wall. My arms flailed as my center of gravity shifted, and automatically grabbed her shoulders to stabilize myself.

"Yuki!" I shouted, panicked. What the hell was she doing!?

She pushed me against the back of the seat and raised her right leg swung it over my body, briefly flashing her panties, before settling her weight right over my waist!

"Desire caught my attention…"

My jaw dropped. I couldn't help myself from reacting to the pressure of her body against my nether area. In a million years, I could never have predicted Yuki doing this! God, if you're up there, I have but one wish – please, under no circumstances, allow anyone to walk in-

"Kyon!"

Mikuru, Koizumi and Haruhi stood at the doorway, staring aghast.

And that right there is proof that god hates me.


End file.
